complete and utter dependence

I am finding myself in a place that is hard to be, but a good and necessary place. As I look at 2009 I realize my complete and utter dependence on God. So often it is easy to feel self-reliant and 'in control' in our culture. But, today as I look back I see God' provision and His direction. I am grateful in His protection and His discipline - both for things I understand and things I do not.

For many who are praying for my upcoming trip to Ukraine, I have postponed my departure by a couple of weeks to allow friends traveling to return, additional funds to be raised and finalizing travel plans. I am hoping to leave the last week of January. Please pray with me for God's continued provision as well as His perfect timing.

Wishing you many blessings in 2009!

Sticks and stones my break my bones, but words... they REALLY hurt!

James, Chapter 3 from The Message says,

When You Open Your Mouth
1-2Don't be in any rush to become a teacher, my friends. Teaching is highly responsible work. Teachers are held to the strictest standards. And none of us is perfectly qualified. We get it wrong nearly every time we open our mouths. If you could find someone whose speech was perfectly true, you'd have a perfect person, in perfect control of life.
3-5A bit in the mouth of a horse controls the whole horse. A small rudder on a huge ship in the hands of a skilled captain sets a course in the face of the strongest winds. A word out of your mouth may seem of no account, but it can accomplish nearly anything—or destroy it!
5-6It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell.
7-10This is scary: You can tame a tiger, but you can't tame a tongue—it's never been done. The tongue runs wild, a wanton killer. With our tongues we bless God our Father; with the same tongues we curse the very men and women he made in his image. Curses and blessings out of the same mouth!
10-12My friends, this can't go on. A spring doesn't gush fresh water one day and brackish the next, does it? Apple trees don't bear strawberries, do they? Raspberry bushes don't bear apples, do they? You're not going to dip into a polluted mud hole and get a cup of clear, cool water, are you?
Live Well, Live Wisely 13-16Do you want to be counted wise, to build a reputation for wisdom? Here's what you do: Live well, live wisely, live humbly. It's the way you live, not the way you talk, that counts. Mean-spirited ambition isn't wisdom. Boasting that you are wise isn't wisdom. Twisting the truth to make yourselves sound wise isn't wisdom. It's the furthest thing from wisdom—it's animal cunning, devilish conniving. Whenever you're trying to look better than others or get the better of others, things fall apart and everyone ends up at the others' throats.
17-18Real wisdom, God's wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor.

Today I am wondering if my words encourage and build people up. When I'm thinking about it, focusing on my words and their impact, it's a little easier. But what about when I am discouraged, tired or rushed? How do I speak to people?

I just spent the weekend with my niece and nephew who happen to be 2 of the coolest little humans on earth. I thought a lot about words because they are like sponges. They repeat everything I say. I need to remember this when there is seemingly no one around to repeat my every word too.

Prayer for our Country

Today I expressed my dismay with the proposed abortion bailout with a friend. And she started crying... I became ashamed that it hadn't brought tears to my eyes today. Sometimes we get so caught up in our own lives and circumstances that we forget that there's a lot going on... that does effect our everyday lives.

So, friends, I ask you to pray for our country; for our current president and the president elect. And, I would also request that you take a look at www.sba-list.org or www.catholicnewsagency.com to learn more about the 50 page proposal put together by abortion groups asking for tax payer dollars of over $1.5 billion to fund the abortion industry.

There are Legislative Action Alerts on the bottom third of the Susan B. Anthony List website which allow you to learn more and also help to keep tax dollars out of the abortion industry.

I have been silent since the election. I simply cannot be silent today. The unborn babies need a voice. They need your voice too.

A-E-I-O-U and sometimes Y

This week and next I am at Language Acquisition School in Palmer Lake, Colorado. Missions Training International (MTI) runs a two week school to help prepare missionaries heading all over the world to learn other languages.

It has been fun to get to know people with similar passion and heart for a lost world. There are families and other single adults, all getting ready to leave the comfortable and step out into new adventures. Part of the comfortableness that we are leaving is the tones and sounds that we are familiar with in the English language. There is a sound box of 44 sounds in English. For the past 3 days, and for the next 9, my mouth and tongue have been twisted into new contortions to make noises that I didn't think were possible. They challenge us to be conscious of what our mouth and tongue are doing when we make any sound - both familiar and new.

Honestly, I wondered what in the world we were going to do for two weeks. But, the time has been refreshing, challenging and going bye very, very quickly. The split us up into groups and help us learn a language that we will not be using per se, but to teach us methodology and give us tools for learning. Yesterday morning and today, I will be working on learning French. We've also comprehended a little of a tribal language from South Vietnam from the couple who began this training years ago.

I am encouraged in the necessity of learning Russian. Realizing that I am very blessed to have Marina help me with Russian while I am in the states and looking forward to soon being immersed in the culture and language in Ukraine. Thank you for your prayers as I continue through this training. Please pray that all of us remain healthy. Some of the children have started passing 'bugs' around.

(The pictures are the views from the front and back of our facility here in Palmer Lake)

Hope

The past year, as in no other time of my life, I continue to learn to be dependent on God as He provides. As I watch news clips and hear reports of a multi billion dollar bailout by the US Government for our banking industry I am reminded of so much scripture where Jesus warns us not to store up earthly treasure, but reminding us that our hope is eternal.

I am not saying we should be irresponsible or encouraging people to not plan ahead, but just want to remind us all, myself included, that Jesus never fails. His world interest and love for mankind is here to stay. Period.

All of this coupled with a great sermon yesterday reminding us that the "I AM" who sent Moses to Pharaoh so that the Israelites would be freed is the same today that He was then. He is our redeemer, our sustenance, our life, our love, our salvation, our stronghold, our breath... the list goes on and on.

Matthew 6:25-34 "Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about you body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Gather feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labot or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

What are you afraid of?

This summer my family spent a week together in a cabin on Strawberry Lake. It was right after my niece and nephew got out of school, so the weather was a bit tenuous. Most mornings provided a cool, flat lake for peaceful kayaking and canoeing. A few of the days proved to be a little cool for actual swimming, but we filled our time with playing on the swing set and evening walks around the lake looking for deer, fox and wild turkeys.

My nephews favorite few minutes of the stay was when I dumped into the lake in a kayak. Most days we could coax him to the dock by announcing that Aunt Amy was getting in a boat. He would demand 'do it again Aunt Amy, do it again' and giggle while he waited and I was unwilling to oblige.

Our enticement to bring him down to the dock became more difficult on a particularly warm, sunny day. We pleaded for him to come join us in and by the water, but he wanted to stay in the loft and look on at the water. For whatever reason he was convinced that it was going to rain, which bothers him GREATLY. For most of the warmest day, he was inside looking out. We wanted him to experience the joy of the day, but were unable to allay his fears of 'pending rain' and he missed out.

What am I afraid of? When is God pleading me to enjoy the day while I am obsessed with something so ridiculous that all standing by realize that the chances of my fear becoming reality is slim to none? When do I need to experience the joy of the day instead of watching out the window? God promises us 'more than we can ask or imagine'!

Refined as Gold

Job 23:8-10 says, "But if I go to the east, he is not there; if I go to the west, I do not find him. When he is at work in the north, I do not see him; when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him. But he knows the way I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold."

I've been thinking about making God smile this week... What makes God smile? Often we think of very grand things. Maybe it is the simple. When I go through the fire, do I come out as gold? That certainly would make God smile. We are so task oriented that we focus on the end of the journey. Maybe it's the journey that we should focus on. Does God smile when he sees my everyday, normal, behind closed doors life?

Sunshine and Rain

Today in Grand Rapids we experienced a rainy, overcast morning. My grass and flowers were parched and thirsty. You could see the effects of our dry hot weather in my yard. I am reminded that just like the grass and flowers, my life needs to experience the rain sometimes too. My spirits today matched the weather here. My soul is crying out because of a pending delay in my departure to Ukraine. Realizing that a few months is a drop in the bucket in light of eternity does not always 'feel' better...

So I spend time on my knees. Begging for peace and continued direction.

Kyiv

I arrived safe and sound.  This visit my internet access is not as easy as it has been in the past, but I will do my best to keep you updated.

As I was walking this morning, I was thinking of the irony that I travel here alone but when in the US never go anywhere without someone.  Perhaps this is traveling, but it feels like everyday life.  Not really sure.  And, here I cannot just blurt things out to strangers when I feel the need to talk.  Well, I could but they would just look at me oddly.

Today is busy with planning and trying to get the rest of my time here organized.  It's good to see friends.  I spent the day Sunday at church and at a woman's birthday party.  The token American who stopped on the way to buy flowers... it will get you in the door of almost any Ukrainian!

Got to run.  More plans to arrange.

no 2 alike

Every time I travel I am amazed at the diversity of the human race. This last week I presented 'How to Teach Creatively with Music' and we talked about how our God is so amazingly creative...

When you look at 20 people walking by in an airport, or maybe even 2 people passing by, you can't help but be amazed at the fact that no 2 humans on the face of the earth are identical.And, each of us has been uniquely gifted. So, the fact that I am thrilled to go back to Ukraine today and meet with churches with active drug rehab programs and learn about how they are challenged with the issues of the disease on a daily basis would send chills up and down some others spines. Hmm.

Be thankful for who you are and what God has in store!I'll keep you posted. Stay tuned. No 2 alike.